Saturday, 10 November 2012


At the left, there is a blue human wearing all...
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You could have read my article on the good news about being single women.   

However, here is the other side of the coin and it applies to the men as well as the women.

If you are happy being single,  I congratulate you.  But if you are single and still looking for the right one to share your life, here are five possible reasons why you have not yet found that person.

Reason No. One  You have a long and unrealistic checklist

Do you have a list of favorable traits that is more than a page long?  It might be high time to start cutting out some.  Strike it out if you wrote this:

a. Tall, dark, good looking man who loves to do the dishes and never forgets our anniversaries and birthdays.

b. Slim, blonde and blue eyed lady who loves watching football and cooking dinner every evening.

The chances to meet such a human being are slim to say the very least.  If you don't want a smoker or someone who has children, that's alright.  This can be considered as absolute non-negotiable, but do allow some leeway with the 'not-too-sure-about-this-but-could-probably-be-acceptable points.

There is a good chance you are  bypassing many wonderful potential partners when you have a restricted idea of a perfect partner.  And they probably have special qualities that you would never even thought of adding to your list before.

Reason No. Two  Revealing too much, too soon

Going on dates gives you the opportunity to get to know each other and sharing information about yourself.  But if you start sharing about your last relationship,  the medication you are taking and your family problems, it will probably put off a potential partner.

While you hope that your date is thinking "Wow! he/she is really interesting" they will more likely be thinking of something like this "Is this really something I would like to get myself into?"  

Though it is good to reveal sufficient information to keep your date interested,  it is really not wise to reveal too much information in just one night.

Reason No. Three  You are too needy 

You have just met each other for a full five minutes and suddenly you start calling her throughout the day to see what she is doing.  Or you show up at his guys' card game night  because you wanted to check up on him.  

When you do that, you are heading for a dating disaster.  If this is you, it may be hard to read what comes next.....You have to face the fact that you need to get a life.  

Your possible partner for life will find it attractive if you are independent.  Having hobbies, interest and activities shows that you are a interesting, well rounded person and it opens the door to many lively conversations when you are together.  

It can be smothering and scary for your other half to feel as thought they are your whole universe.  One misstep and your entire universe will collapse and disappear into a black hole.  

Now, that is a lot of pressure to put on any relationship, let along a budding one.

Reason No. Four  You are attracted to the wrong type

Some singles are attracted to ladies with three kids and a law degree or a stout gentleman with an adventurous spirit and a nature lover.  Most of us have a type of person that we tend to be drawn to.  If the relationships you have had in the past have failed, it might be the right time to begin rethinking your type.

Do you seem to go for the type who likes to play hard to get?   Or the type who are workaholics that you have to make an appointment just to meet up?  If that is the situation you are facing, it will never work out and it is time to re-evaluate what you are really searching for in a suitable partner.

Most people make the mistake of sticking to one specific type and sees the relationship repeatedly fail.  One of the reasons why failure happens is because we can take this person under our wing and we find the urge to change or 'tame' them.  If this need to change or 'tame them exists, then they are probably not your type at all.

Reason No. Five  You exude negative energy on the outside

No matter how nice you feel in your brand new clothes or how much confidence you exhibit with your stylish new haircut, if you are feeling negative, it is going to be reflected on the exterior.  If you have gone on a string of unsuccessful dates, there is a more than likely chance you will not have the most positive vibes about an upcoming date.

Your negativity may have stemmed from seeing your best friend's girlfriend cheating on him or watching your parent's relationship disintegrate when you were young.  This does not mean that you will end up just like them.

You may need to go out on a few more dates before you find your prince or princess but if from the get go, you come across as grumpy and negative throughout the date, you have already stepped out on the wrong foot by giving a bad impression.

Keep an open mind when you approach your date and you will quadruple your chances to succeed in meeting Mr Right or Miss Right.

My next topic for discussion is, "Final Five Myths About Weight Loss."

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What makes us strong, 
can send us pain.
One right, one wrong, 
lightning drain.
Emotionally dry, 
the mind turning, why? 
we seek for answers, 
lead our feelings dances.
In the darkest light, 
we tend to fight, 
what we treasure.
we sometimes measure, 
the love for one person.
Rejoin in unison. 
forgive, be forgotten, 
admission, submission.

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